Popping pills

One pill down,
I don’t feel a thing.
I wonder how long it will be,
for the effect to kick in.

Two pills down,
still feeling nothing at all.
Staring at my phone,
hoping you will call.

Three and four down together,
seems easier that way.
Remembering the last time I saw you,
what a wonderful day.

Five pills down,
starting to feel drowsy now.
Hope I don’t have second thoughts,
guess it’s too late anyhow.

Six, seven and eight goes down,
now its kicking in.
All I ever did was to love you,
how can that be a sin.

Number nine goes down,
they don’t even taste bitter no more.
Getting a bit dizzy now,
so I ease myself onto the floor.

Ten, eleven and twelve,
wondering why I’m counting.
How many more do I need,
to feel absolutely nothing?

Thirteen is swallowed quickly,
I feel my throat closing.
My stomach is working overtime,
I can taste the bile rising.

Fourteen and fifteen are pretty hard,
my vision is getting blurry.
Can’t be much longer now,
I guess I’d better hurry.

Sixteen goes down easier,
always been my lucky number.
Will this be the one to knock me out,
to put me in my slumber.

Seventeen I drop a few times,
my hands are starting to shake.
I guess this is it now,
I can barely stay awake.

Swallowing the rest of them together,
no need to count anymore.
My body is numb and can’t see a thing,
as I cramp up on the floor.

I love you baby and I always will,
but I can’t take this much pain.
Please God let these pills do the job,
I don’t ever want to wake up again.